I’ve got a Tumblr page. Now I’ve got a few hundred friends on FB, another few dozen or so subscribers on Youtube, and, if I’m lucky, a family member or two might occasionally read this online pastiche, but somehow I’ve amassed almost 17,000 Tumblr followers. Apparently this doesn’t translate to DVD sales or gym memberships, or even more hits on this main blog, but it does mean I’ve recently become inundated with varying degrees of questions, mostly about fitness. There are a great deal beyond the ones listed below. I’ll get to those very soon, I promise.
Important! I’m not editing these questions. Spell check, folks. Proofread. Like I mentioned in the first “Questions Answered” post, give a shit, people! Why should your questions be answered if you don’t show the respect of presenting the question with some decent spelling and grammar? So any errors in the questions comes directly from the inquisitor. I just cut and paste.
The Bodytribe Iron Syndicate deadlifts for reps
Q: Hi, I’m quite stocky, 6’1 and quite a lot of fat, however I would like to achieve an athletic body, which is not just big for appearance, but athletically tuned, so balanced for all kinds of sports and outdoor activities. Is your blog mainly about bulking up or will blog be able to give me some insight into achieving this, in terms eating healthier and specific types of exercise? I’ll appreciate any help you can give.
A: My blog? Bodytribe.com or Tumblr? Either way, it’s the gospel of movement and ability. An “athletic body” is one that is capable of many things, while honing longevity both physical and metaphysical so as to always improve itself and therefore the tribe. This brings us back to the 3 basics, Train Hard, Eat Well, Rest Hard, and my words are often geared as to how, and more importantly WHY, the three basics are so important. Will that lead to being “athletically tuned” (good term, by the way)? Yup. But your goal is stated in a haze…are ya gearing up to be athletic, or just look like you are? Well one leads to the other. Can ya guess which order?
Darrin about to go for a walk. A heavy walk.
Q: When you say fitness industry nonsense what do you mean?
A: One of my favorite questions so far. The Fitness Industrial Complex is rooted in selling you aesthetic perfection, which is not actually fitness. I write a great deal more about it here . And I offer the antithesis to the philosophical vacuum that is the modern fitness sham here .
A discarded tire filled with some dumbbells makes for a cheap but effective tool.
Q: Given that one would need to create a deficit of about 1000 calories per day to lose 2 pounds of fat per week, is this at all realistic to do? I really want to lose weight fast but I am trying to do it correctly.
A: Wanna lose weight really fast? Chop off a limb. An arm is good for about 15 pounds… gone! Just like that. Now tell me your real goal… to be healthier? No, not if you’re so stuck on the concept of rapid weight loss. It’s to become more appealing. Ya wanna crank up the hotness factor. So the big question is really “why is that important?”
Hey, it is something we all strive for, but it isn’t a fitness goal. Aesthetic attraction is an outcome of fitness, a required byproduct if the three basics are met (Train Hard, Eat Well, Rest Hard), but it isn’t a fitness issue. You’ll look your best when you’re in the best health, but looking good doesn’t instantly mean you are IN your best health. Get it?
Rapid weightloss is not a fitness goal, since fitness, especially the concept of holistic wellness that I subscribe to, entails creating a better relationship between you and your body. That is antithetical to rapid weightloss, and if you don’t understand that, then rephrase the question to “Why isn’t rapid weightloss healthy” and then I’ll answer it.
Oh, and strong is hot. Ability is sexy. Confidence and embodiment will turns heads and various other body parts.
Q: Not only do I like your blog (haha I found it) but I also am OBSESSED with you secretly. Ok here we go.. I got this idea from a Tumblr spam I got once lol.. I think you like me too and you were always too shy to admit it :3 go to crushmatches(dót)com (wtf it wont let me link regular) and make an account there. Then look up the profile ‘gottagetme19′ (me obviously) I left body pictures.. if you can guess who I am hit me up and we’ll hang soon. You need a C C but its free
A: Wow, you’re so right… I’m obsessed with YOU too! And I AM too shy to admit it. You must be as awesome as I always thought, Spambot, so you should visit my page that I created to celebrate my love for you. It’s called doilooklikeafuckingidiot.com, and if you sign on (don’t worry, it’s free), you can check out the pictures I’ve posted dedicated to my crush on you.
Q: You’ve probably been asked this a hundred times, but what is your work out schedule?
A: Why, wanna join me? And, strangely enough, I haven’t been asked that much at all, so thanks for thinking of me. 3-4 days a week, plus small 5-10-minute sessions of mobility flows or bodyweight exercises throughout the week
Q: what are the best exercises to gain chest size and definition especially in the middle of your chest?
A: The middle of your chest? Like if I drew a target on each pec, the dot that would be dead center? Of course not, you mean where the muscle attaches to the sternum, that area between the pecs. Well, the answer is the same for either… if you’re as big and strong as you’re going to get, and it hasn’t happened yet, then it ain’t gonna. The shape of the muscle has centuries of genes determining how it will form, although you can work on making it both bigger and stronger. How? Train Hard, Eat Well, Rest Hard… ya know, the 3 basics I always mention. Push something away from you or push yourself away from something, then the chest is working. Presses of all sorts, pushups of all sorts… those types of things. Is there a magic one? Despite the legends and myths of the bodybuilding world, no. Just put some gusto into the movements of choice… make it heavy and execute it with competence.
As for ‘definition,’ eat better.
Oh, and ask yourself why this goal stands out as one that needs pursuing. Is the rest of your body so strong, built and jaw dropping that only the middle of the chest is left? Or perhaps you woke up one day and discovered that, during the night a sinkhole appeared between your boobs and now ya want to fill it in with muscle. Well, whatever the reason, you rarely find folks with seriously strong lifting skills worrying about the middle of their chests. So lift hard and get strong… the body will follow.
Q: I am a full-time college student and a part-time worker. I am a bit full with projects right now as well. I registered for a 5k at the end of November, and have been doing a lot of sprints to increase my endurance/recovery time. My workout regime has me working out M-Sat for an hour with Sunday off. Today, after last nights sprints, classes, and work i was/am SO tired. I can’t tell when my body REALLY needs a break, or if this is a time to push myself. I want to lose the last 10 lbs.
A: Whoa, whoa… wait. You wanna lose 10 pounds or ya wanna do good on a 5k? Yes, you’re depending on volume, and probably a bit much of it. Sprints are great, but by definition, they’re fast, requiring a lot of energy from all the systems of your body. Do them better, not more. And eat. I’m going to guess you’ve restricted your calories while increasing your volume. Oops. Big mistake.
So yes, take a break. And for the love of Cthulu, do something other than run.
Odessa fishes her 400m in the early morning sun.
Q: Hey! I really like your website and youtube. Im a 17 year old boy and Im just getting into fitness. Got any tips for a beginer?
A: Oh, that’s a real big question, one I could write an entire book on. In fact, I sort of did, although my first book is geared towards any level of lifter. Here’s your lifelong homework: define “fitness” and define “strength.” Ya can’t achieve what isn’t defined. Don’t worry, your definitions are allowed to evolve over time. But once you begin defining them, then you can at least have answers as to what it is your looking for. Then you can ask more specific questions, and seek out folks who might have some good ideas on the subject.
In fact, when you come up with your definitions, feel free to share them here. Then you might have more questions. And I’ll have more answers.
Revisiting an old picture from our archives or Al front squatting.
Q: heyyy I’m 102 and i back sqaut 85, how much do you recommend that i max out? 
A: I have no idea what you’re asking. How much weight should your max effort squat be? “How much” in terms of volume? What is the actual question? Is our language dead, or am I being picky? Are you 102 pounds? Kilos? Years old?
Q: I can do pistols and 3rd world squats. I am currently working on my Cossacks. Do you have any special tricks or progressions? Either my heel comes off the ground or I need to hold something in front of me to avoid losing balance to the rear.
A: I like this question, and although it seems strange that someone who can pistol and ass-to-grass squat can’t do a Cossack, it is more common than one might think, and for good reason. Some bodies are quite capable at sagittal movements, but hold tension that creates difficulty in lateral movements. I bet if you took a hard medicine ball and attempted to roll your adductors on it, they’d feel tight and painful. And your TFLs and glutes might need some love, both through tissue manipulation (rolling, massage) and probably a dose of strength work as well.
Oh, there’s more… I’d wanna see what your pelvis and spine do during any squat, and lateral mobility of the ankle join might be fun to play with, but I won’t babble on. Let’s keep things simple. Keep practicing the Cossack, slowly and deliberately, like a yoga asana, and make sure to hang out at your lowest position for a bit with the constant thought of ‘proud, sit back, bend the knee.’ But also make sure you’re taking your recommended daily dose of mobility and tension release work as well. From yoga asanas to isolated joint mobility drills and a huge bunch of stuff in between, those hips wanna open up a bit.
At about 1:22 in this video, my buddy Tav has some fun with Cossacks, if you’d like to see someone who is far better than I do them.
Q: Hello, I am one of those people that is comfortable with my weight; however I want to become stronger. I am very weak and I truthfully don’t like that at all. How can I become stronger physically with a lack of resources? I don’t have a gym and the only weights I own are 5 to 10 lbs weights…. Is there anything I can do?? Thanks.
A: Hallelujah. Yes, there is plenty you can do. Here’s the beautiful story of the fitness industry… you don’t really need it. You’ve got enough to work with just by being a pawn in gravity’s game.
Ever seen a weak gymnast? We’ve got plenty of challenges against gravity’s dogma without needing any equipment, or even much space. From the hundreds of pushup variations, to the array of squat and lunge possibilities, not to mention the world of movement and strength involved in hand balancing and gymnastics, you’ve got a lifetime of opportunity to get incredibly strong without anything more than YOU.
Listing the exercises would probably be a waste of time if you don’t have the chance to learn what they are, but a bit of research into bodyweight movements will yield a plethora of potential. Here’s a burpee video that is part of my Brutal Recess DVD that offers some playful, but intense, ideas (and also features Tav)…
Q: Hey there, your blog is really inspiring me! I have been wanting to start working out and gaining muscle but I am extremely busy. What would you suggest for strength training for someone with very strenuous schedule?
A: This is similar to the last question in that you’re missing an important resource, in this case, Time. I’ve got a ritual I perform on days that seem to leak the hours away. It’s a 3-minute workout (but can be expanded accordingly), and requires very little equipment and only a modicum of space. I pick 3 exercises, usually just bodyweight unless I have some heavy toy lying around, like a sandbag or kettlebell (or drunken dwarf). I do each exercise for 1 minute.
That’s it. I repeat it for 5 days, trying to beat my number each time. If I did 30 pushups at the beginning of the 5 days, you bet your ass I’m gunning for at least 2-3 more every day.
I have a loose template I follow. Something from the pushup list (lots of possibilities), something hip related (jump squats, knee ups, split squats, switch lunges, etc) and something involving everything, like a burpee variation (see the burpee video I posted above). If I have the chance, I’d include pull-ups of some sort, but the chance of having something to hang from might not always exist.
Oh, did I mention that technique ALWAYS trumps volume? If something starts to suck, stop doing it, shake the arms and legs out and start again only when you can get more reps with pure form. They can be fast, they just can’t be sloppy. Practice makes permanent, and we don’t need our bodies learning permanent slop.
Is there anything magical about a minute each, or only 3 exercises? Of course not. This is simply my example of some ass-whuppin’ in a short amount of time. If three minutes can be brutal (and it can), imagine what 5-10 minutes can be, if the focus, intensity and technique are spot on.
More to come next week as Tumblr seems to bring me questions daily.
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